Are you reluctant to put yourself first and make yourself a priority?
You’re not alone in feeling like this. It’s one of the biggest reasons why women hesitate before joining me in The Burnout Fix. I’ve worked with hundreds of women and the concept of struggling to put themselves first is a common theme.p
Most of my clients lead super busy lives (which is a big factor in why they’re feeling so rubbish) and are so used to doing all the things.
Like you, they are just not used to being their own biggest priority. This was definitely true for Fiona, who openly admits that putting herself first was completely alien to her.
“I’ve never been good at putting myself first so my biggest hesitation was whether I could commit to putting myself first. Investing time and money into The Burnout Fix meant I had to and I was able to carve out periods to go for a walk or do meal prep and it quickly became second nature.”
Making the decision to invest in themselves is truly life-changing, both for yourself and others.
Keep reading to find out why ignoring your own needs is contributing to the fatigue, brain fog, anxiety and weight gain that you’re experiencing and why focusing on YOU can change everything.
How Putting Yourself Last Is Affecting Your Health & Wellbeing
Modern life is stressful. By the time you reach your 40s or 50s, you’ve likely been juggling various stresses for decades. There’s work and family life, and you may be worrying about elderly parents by this stage too.
Don’t forget about the impact of physical stress too, such as a high-sugar diet, a restrictive diet that doesn’t provide enough calories or nourishment, overexercising, blood sugar fluctuations and poor sleep (to name just a few!).
Eventually, it gets too much for your body to cope with. The adrenals respond by secreting higher amounts of stress hormones, particularly cortisol and adrenaline.
When cortisol is high, we’re in fat storage mode and metabolism is reduced. It’s a huge factor in why you can’t lose weight and why you’re so tired and overwhelmed.
One of the pillars we work on in The Burnout Fix is relaxation and self-care. It’s pretty much impossible to balance your hormones and start to resolve your symptoms without this foundation.
Why It’s Not Selfish To Put Yourself First
Take a few seconds to think about what life is like right now - not just for yourself but for your family too.
You don’t have the energy or motivation to spend time with the kids or your partner. It’s not that you don’t want to but let’s face it, even getting off the sofa is an effort most days because you’re so exhausted.
You snap at your partner, kids and anyone else who crosses your path because your hormones and moods are all over the place and even the tiniest bit of stress tips you over the edge. Although it pains you to admit you, you’re horrible to be around and you really wish that you had more control over your moods and emotions.
When you’re making everyone else a priority, you’re actually doing everyone around you a huge disservice.
They’re not getting the best of you (or anywhere near it) because you don’t have the energy or motivation for it. And the guilt you feel for being a “rubbish” parent/partner/friend/colleague and not being able to show up in the way you want to keeps getting stronger.
Let’s take a second to flip this on its head.
What will it mean for your family if you have the energy to be a bigger part of family life because you’re not exhausted and dragging yourself through the day?
What if your family no longer have to put up with you biting their heads off because your moods are balanced and you’re able to cope better with stress?
When you start to resolve your symptoms, it’s not just you that benefits from the transformation.
Making time to relax and do something for yourself every day, whether that’s a long soak in the bath, curling up with a good book or having coffee with a friend, takes us out of fight-or-flight mode.
Start small and aim for 5 minutes or so that’s just for you. That’s what we aim for in The Burnout Fix because it’s doable, even when you’re feeling overwhelmed. We can build from there so that cortisol levels can become more balanced and the adrenals are no longer under a huge amount of pressure.
It’s time to put yourself first and invest in your health so that everyone can benefit from your new-found energy, balanced moods and lack of guilt!
When you can get to the root cause of your symptoms and take back your power, the life-changing effects extend far beyond yourself.
Far from being selfish, deciding to focus on what YOU need is exactly what your family needs.